suddenly i felt that there has been so many things i would like to do..but it seems like it's been so difficult getting down to doing it..
i would love to bring the dogs or even tabbie alone to the dog run
i would love to spend a day at tanjong beach with the dogs
i would love to spend one of de weekends blading at east coast
but i chose to waste my life and weekend away
suddenly i felt that there's been a lost of life..
suddenly i felt that there's no direction in life anymore..
i'm getting bored...real bored.
depressed...real depress
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Tuesday, April 08, 2008
Lucky Star for Furby
this is for furby..hope that everything will be fine for her May's surgery.May she be blessed with a speedy recovery.
ah yee, u must take care also ok?? been so long since we catch up.
i've never forget how u used to be there for me ... :)
if there's anything i can help with, please do let me know.
Monday, April 07, 2008
Love Language #2: Quality Time
My version of #1 is really summarized, in face gary chapman included a case study and some notes for all of us to take note off, but it's not polite for me to palagarize everything in my blog.
So for those of you who's really keen, do read this book ok?
Now let's get to #2: Quality time.
How many times you hear this? "it's quality over quantity!!" if u think u've spent enuff time with ur partner and why is she still not satisfied, then think again? how did you spend the time together?
were you talking to her while reading the papers? were you talking to her while watching tv? is that considered time spent with her without paying 100% attention on her?
By quality time, its means giving someoned your UNDIVIDED ATTENTION.
it doesn't mean sitting on the sofa watching tv and talking, but with the tv off, both looking at each other, giving the 100% full attention, talking!
it means going for a walk, just the 2 of you, going for dinner and looking at each other when you eat with the conversation going on.
When u sit on de sofa talking to ur partner , giving her 20 minutes of ur full attention and she does likewise, you're giving each other 20 mins of your life, and u'll never have this 20 minutes again! it is a powerful communicator of love.
There's this case study of a husband who is too busy with work than to spend time with his wife, then Gary Chapman asked him a question that probably got him thinking when he's telling Gary how he climbed the organizational ladder to feed the family:
"Do you want to be up there alone? or do you want to be there with your wife and children?"
how many times have we used work as an excuse to spending time with our loved ones? now think again, even if u are a high flyer, what's the point when u have no loved ones around you?
" A Central Aspect of Quality time is Togetherness
I do not mean proximity
Togetherness has to do with focused attention"
and of cos gary suggested him to take time off to bring his wife and children out etc. their love life made a tremendous improvment! his wife is no longer always nagging at him and being unhappy and seeing his work as a threat.
There's anor story whereby a man approached gary and told him what a fool he realised he was.
His wife will always come home from work, telling him her problems at work, and he will always advise her on what he think she should do"
now u guyz are thinking nothing wrong with that right?
everynite de same thing happened, naturally de man is upset with his wife for not listening to his advice. He told her not to expect anymore sympathy from him since she refused to heed his advice and she would not have to live with these problems if she heed his advices.
the next time she try to bring up the problem, he told her that he is not going to listen to her since she's not following his advice.
After the divorce, then he realised that his wife did not want advice from him when she tell him his problems
she wanted sympathy, wanted him to listen to her, to give her attention, to let her know he understand the hurt and pressure she's going through, she need that moral support and re assureness from her husband.
Is this situation familar? it's very familar and close to my heart, de whole of chapter 2 actually.
i love to whine and i'm always very critical, but when i'm whining, sometimes i just need some sympathy and reassurance.
then again, who is there to understand the need? who is there to provide the undivided attention for me?
"many of us are trained to analyze problems and create solutions
we forgot that marriage is a relationship, not a project or problem to be solved"
The last of this chapter talks about quality activities, there will be different activities that a couple enjoys.
but it doesnt hurt to give in to each other and do what each other like to do together.
well i played WOW for de very obvious reasons, he's crazy over them and spent so much time with the game.
before i started to play, i can see that he is really hoping that one of these days i can play together with them.
and so i did in the end..so as to do something i know he'd enjoy.
So for those of you who's really keen, do read this book ok?
Now let's get to #2: Quality time.
How many times you hear this? "it's quality over quantity!!" if u think u've spent enuff time with ur partner and why is she still not satisfied, then think again? how did you spend the time together?
were you talking to her while reading the papers? were you talking to her while watching tv? is that considered time spent with her without paying 100% attention on her?
By quality time, its means giving someoned your UNDIVIDED ATTENTION.
it doesn't mean sitting on the sofa watching tv and talking, but with the tv off, both looking at each other, giving the 100% full attention, talking!
it means going for a walk, just the 2 of you, going for dinner and looking at each other when you eat with the conversation going on.
When u sit on de sofa talking to ur partner , giving her 20 minutes of ur full attention and she does likewise, you're giving each other 20 mins of your life, and u'll never have this 20 minutes again! it is a powerful communicator of love.
There's this case study of a husband who is too busy with work than to spend time with his wife, then Gary Chapman asked him a question that probably got him thinking when he's telling Gary how he climbed the organizational ladder to feed the family:
"Do you want to be up there alone? or do you want to be there with your wife and children?"
how many times have we used work as an excuse to spending time with our loved ones? now think again, even if u are a high flyer, what's the point when u have no loved ones around you?
" A Central Aspect of Quality time is Togetherness
I do not mean proximity
Togetherness has to do with focused attention"
and of cos gary suggested him to take time off to bring his wife and children out etc. their love life made a tremendous improvment! his wife is no longer always nagging at him and being unhappy and seeing his work as a threat.
There's anor story whereby a man approached gary and told him what a fool he realised he was.
His wife will always come home from work, telling him her problems at work, and he will always advise her on what he think she should do"
now u guyz are thinking nothing wrong with that right?
everynite de same thing happened, naturally de man is upset with his wife for not listening to his advice. He told her not to expect anymore sympathy from him since she refused to heed his advice and she would not have to live with these problems if she heed his advices.
the next time she try to bring up the problem, he told her that he is not going to listen to her since she's not following his advice.
After the divorce, then he realised that his wife did not want advice from him when she tell him his problems
she wanted sympathy, wanted him to listen to her, to give her attention, to let her know he understand the hurt and pressure she's going through, she need that moral support and re assureness from her husband.
Is this situation familar? it's very familar and close to my heart, de whole of chapter 2 actually.
i love to whine and i'm always very critical, but when i'm whining, sometimes i just need some sympathy and reassurance.
then again, who is there to understand the need? who is there to provide the undivided attention for me?
"many of us are trained to analyze problems and create solutions
we forgot that marriage is a relationship, not a project or problem to be solved"
The last of this chapter talks about quality activities, there will be different activities that a couple enjoys.
but it doesnt hurt to give in to each other and do what each other like to do together.
well i played WOW for de very obvious reasons, he's crazy over them and spent so much time with the game.
before i started to play, i can see that he is really hoping that one of these days i can play together with them.
and so i did in the end..so as to do something i know he'd enjoy.
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
sth to sharea: The 5 Love Languages
as we're starting to plan really really slowly for our future, my bro intro this book to me for married couples.
Thought it was quite a good book just that such books are always soooo boring and dry.
So i'm gona take my own sweet time to read and i do believe that most of you will find the pointers useful BUT probably not the patience and time to read right?
Mr. Black for once will never read such books..
so i've decided to summarise each chapter and to share with you guyz on some pointers..
Intro: Keeping De Love Tank Full
"At the heart of mankind's existence is the desire to be intimate and to be loved by another
Marriage is designed to meet that need for intimacy and love"
The writer believed that everyone has a need for love and classified there's basically 5 basic love langauges for each individuals.
Keeping one's emotional love tank full is as important to a marriage as maintaining the proper oil level is to an automobile. Running your marriage on an empty "love tank" could cost more than trying to drive ur car w/o oil.
Chapter 1: Love Language #1 Words of Affirmation
Writer, Gary Chapman, belives that one way to express love emotionally is to use words to build up.
Verbal compliments, words of appreciation are powerful communicators of love..
this i strongly agree!@@!
even simple words such as " you look good in that dress" "i really appreciate u doing the dishes tonight" etc works wonders!
and i'd think especially to women. we've such soft ears and we love to hear such things all the time.
"The object of love is not getting sth you want, but doing sth for the well being of the one you love
It is a fact, however that when we receive affirming word we are then far more likely to be motivated to reciprocate"
how many of us are guilty of taking our partner for granted? i hope you'd take this phrase into heart and rembr, a simple compliment makes the other party feels appreciated and in fact more like to reciprocate!
no doubt we always do things willingly for the well being of our loved ones, and what else is the best way to "reward" us? nothing but a simple compliment does wonders!!!
I'd say simple thank yous to mr. black for the genting trip he's planned, and told him that i really appreciated the effort he's put in planning all these.
u noe, its juz small lil simple things like this..
and of cos i'm still learning.........there're still times i took him for granted.
And of cos, other than just compliments, give your spouse encouraging & kind words as and when they need!
nothing spur them more than their own partner's encouragement.
sometimes i'd have doubts on my job and the ability to perform to standard and do it well.
but mr. black was there, encouraging me, guiding me, having faith in me that i could make my product fly and painting the picture of how everything will be like for me when my products start to fly!
So rembr, simple compliments does wonders to ur relationship! even a simple thank you, i appreciate ur work makes ppl melt at times.....
this is kinda wordy so chapter 1 shall stop here now..look out for de nxt chapter ya?
let me noe if u guyz like all these if not i may stop halfway, kinda tiring leh to summarise and all...LOL
actually the whole chapter is still pretty long with some case study, i'll read through and see if there's any additional points to add on ya..
Thought it was quite a good book just that such books are always soooo boring and dry.
So i'm gona take my own sweet time to read and i do believe that most of you will find the pointers useful BUT probably not the patience and time to read right?
Mr. Black for once will never read such books..
so i've decided to summarise each chapter and to share with you guyz on some pointers..
Intro: Keeping De Love Tank Full
"At the heart of mankind's existence is the desire to be intimate and to be loved by another
Marriage is designed to meet that need for intimacy and love"
The writer believed that everyone has a need for love and classified there's basically 5 basic love langauges for each individuals.
Keeping one's emotional love tank full is as important to a marriage as maintaining the proper oil level is to an automobile. Running your marriage on an empty "love tank" could cost more than trying to drive ur car w/o oil.
Chapter 1: Love Language #1 Words of Affirmation
Writer, Gary Chapman, belives that one way to express love emotionally is to use words to build up.
Verbal compliments, words of appreciation are powerful communicators of love..
this i strongly agree!@@!
even simple words such as " you look good in that dress" "i really appreciate u doing the dishes tonight" etc works wonders!
and i'd think especially to women. we've such soft ears and we love to hear such things all the time.
"The object of love is not getting sth you want, but doing sth for the well being of the one you love
It is a fact, however that when we receive affirming word we are then far more likely to be motivated to reciprocate"
how many of us are guilty of taking our partner for granted? i hope you'd take this phrase into heart and rembr, a simple compliment makes the other party feels appreciated and in fact more like to reciprocate!
no doubt we always do things willingly for the well being of our loved ones, and what else is the best way to "reward" us? nothing but a simple compliment does wonders!!!
I'd say simple thank yous to mr. black for the genting trip he's planned, and told him that i really appreciated the effort he's put in planning all these.
u noe, its juz small lil simple things like this..
and of cos i'm still learning.........there're still times i took him for granted.
And of cos, other than just compliments, give your spouse encouraging & kind words as and when they need!
nothing spur them more than their own partner's encouragement.
sometimes i'd have doubts on my job and the ability to perform to standard and do it well.
but mr. black was there, encouraging me, guiding me, having faith in me that i could make my product fly and painting the picture of how everything will be like for me when my products start to fly!
So rembr, simple compliments does wonders to ur relationship! even a simple thank you, i appreciate ur work makes ppl melt at times.....
this is kinda wordy so chapter 1 shall stop here now..look out for de nxt chapter ya?
let me noe if u guyz like all these if not i may stop halfway, kinda tiring leh to summarise and all...LOL
actually the whole chapter is still pretty long with some case study, i'll read through and see if there's any additional points to add on ya..
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